I am beginning to think that ridding myself of harmful core beliefs may be trickier than I thought.
I have a good brain, and strong reasoning powers. In the past, when I needed to change my mind, thinking about it and sleeping on it was enough. These core beliefs aren't going away so easily. I guess that's what makes them core beliefs.
I have at least organized them into two groups: one which exists primarily because of experiences with my family, and another associated with church. School doesn't have a set of negative core beliefs; those are thankfully positive.
Family: |
Church: |
I can't be authentically and spontaneously myself |
I am unloveable |
I am hollow |
God does not care about me |
Mom doesn't love me |
I am compliant |
Dad doesn't care about me |
Girls don't like me |
|
I am ugly |
I was surprised yesterday how uncomfortable I was at church. Those are bigger than I thought they were. I spent time with family and really enjoyed it, so it seemed as though the usual reason-controlled process was working. But church threw me a little. A lot. Those beliefs go a lot deeper than I thought. They will take a lot more effort to destroy, more than just writing them down, organizing them, then burning each one in the fireplace as I replaced it with a positive core belief.
I'm interested to see how I'll do it.
Again, wish me luck. I need it.